Most likely LSD. Spends his life in pursuit of little blue guys in faggy
white outfits and mentally abusing his cat. What does he plan to do with
the blue dwarfs when he catches them anyway?
9. Olive Oyl
Probably Dexatrim abuse, maybe some amphetamines. Who is that skinny?! She
might even be anorexic, she IS always giving her burger to her friend. One
side question, what the hell are Popeye and Brutus thinking? They almost
made the list for courting her.
8. Snagglepuss
Can't explain it. Maybe it's the name, or the look, but he is suspicious.
7. He-Man
This is an easy one. I mean c'mon. Roid monkey #1. "BY THE POWER OF
ANABOL!!!!!!" Makes me want to root for Skeletor. Alone in his castle,
hitting the weights. And on top of that he even injects the shit in his
pet tiger. Animal Abuse.
6. & 5. Yogi and Boo Boo
We all know what is really in those picnic baskets. They go back to the
cave and trip. Another side - Are they gay? I mean, take a look at Boo Boo.
4. Droopy
The number one downer abuser in toon land. Can't someone slip him an upper
every year or two? The only time I ever saw him happy is when he sees the
picture of the babe.
3. Dopey Dwarf
He openly admits it. The other dwarfs deny involvement but they are under
investigations. Allegations that Doc is writing some extra scripts for
Sneezy and all the guys are partaking are afloat.
2. Daffy Duck
If he isn't using crack, Marion Barry is clean. He is so wired he bounces
around on his head without pain. Blows his beak off all the time. Some
symptoms might be from "daffiness" but Haldol wouldn't work for him. Might
for his buddy with Tourettes, Porky though.
1. Shaggy
By far the #1 suspect. His clothes, his hair, his bad goatee, the boy
converses with dogs. But all of this is nothing until you go to the Munchie
Factor. Anybody who averages 9.3 dog treats consumed per episode does pot.
And look at the way him and his friends painted that van!
Source: http://ladycarmel.multiply.com/journal/item/636
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